Julio Vasquez '23 Recruiting Profile

 All dreams have an ending and that happened when I found out about my uncle's death. I was on my way to Arizona for a soccer tournament and after a 9 hour trip I was finally able to check in and fully rest. As I looked for my room with my friend, I checked my phone and saw my cousin had posted the death of his dad. I wasn’t sure what to feel or how to even navigate the emotions that were going inside my head.The first thing that I could only think at that moment was me never seeing my uncle again, what my cousin must have felt, and how my dad would handle the news.There isn’t a single book that can prepare you for a death, not enough encouraging words to lift your spirits but plenty of instant regret and “Had I…” followed by anger and guilt.The year 2020 brought unexpected fear especially around the word “tested positive.” Many, including my own dad, didn’t believe in the seriousness of what COVID-19 could do. One day my dad started to feel under the weather and stayed in his room more than usual, normally my dad would go out for walks but for the first time he didn’t and it started to concern the family. As a family, we encouraged my dad to get tested and hope for the best, maybe he was just feeling down due to a seasonal flu.The worst day of my life was April 5, 2020 when my mom got up in the morning telling my dad we have to go to the hospital.It was hard seeing my dad weak and struggling to breath, he’s been someone who was active and cared for his health. Truth be told, I was scared and for that moment wasn’t sure if I would survive whatever news we got. Every minute a new “What if…” theory would make its way to my pounding heart and cause my body to feel weak. I tried staying positive throughout the wait and like a dog guarding his home, I couldn’t keep my eyes off the door with the eagerness to see my family back. About an hour or two passed and we finally got a phone call from the hospital. The look on my mom's face as she spoke on the phone instantly stopped my beating heart and life suddenly slowed down. Although I could clearly see the tears rolling down my mom’s restless cheeks and the muffled screaming, a sharp ringing noise clogged my ears and soothing warmth worked its way down my face. It felt so soon and awful knowing that I will no longer see his smile or talk with him as we head to the game. I no longer have his support and words of encouragement and that makes me enraged that I can’t share my accomplishment or see him in the bleachers during games. Sometimes I find myself questioning why things happen.

Throughout my life I've come across many challenges and suffered the biggest loss that I still can’t overcome. Through those challenges and falling into a blackhole helped me regain my purpose and pushed me harder. I can’t fully say that I am healed but I’ve learned to cope with the emotions and acknowledge them. There isn’t a cure for everything and I know I will face more heartbreaking moments as I get older. What I do know now is that an apple a day keeps the doctor away!