Big changes are coming to the NCAA and college recruiting. Click here to read more.
  • Popular Links
    • Name Image Likeness (NIL)
    • NCAA Transfer Rules
    • NCAA Scholarship Limits by Sport
    • College Recruiting Guides
    • Everything You Need to Know About JUCO
    • Athlete Success Stories
  • Shop at IMGAcademy
  • Contact Us
  • Log In
    • NCSA College Recruiting
    • Parents & Athletes
    • College Coaches
    • IMG Academy
    • Essentials
    • One-On-One Coaching
    • IMG Academy
    • Blackbaud
    • Teamworks
    • SchoolDoc
  • Call us
NCSA College Recruiting Logo
  • Services
    Student-Athletes

    Gain exposure to college coaches, get step-by-step guidance through the recruiting process, communicate directly with college coaches, access to development and tools to find the right college fit for you.

    College Coaches

    NCSA makes it easy to find the right recruits for your program on the largest recruiting network. We offer tools to simplify communication, track an athlete’s progress and an experienced staff dedicated to helping you succeed.

    Club & High School Coaches

    With NCSA’s recruiting and development education, group workshops and one-on-one coaching, your team can get access to the tools that can help each player perform at their best and navigate their future.

    Student Athlete Services
    College Coaches Services
    Club and HS Coaches Services
    Services
    • Student-Athletes
    • College Coaches
    • Club & High School Coaches
    Connect
    Schedule Assessment Schedule Assessment phone icon Call Us chat icon Start a Chat
  • Resources
    RESOURCES

    Everything student-athletes and their families need to navigate the recruiting and development process.

    Workshops
    College Recruiting Guides
    • How to Get Recruited
    • The Recruiting Process
    • Contacting Coaches
    • Recruiting Guide for Parents
    Scholarships
    • Scholarship Facts
    • Find Scholarships
    NCAA Eligibility
    • NCAA Eligibility Center
    • NCAA Eligibility Requirements
    • NCAA Recruiting Rules
    • NCAA Recruiting Calendars
    More Resources
    • NAIA Eligibility
    • Workshops
    • Blog
    By Sport
    Women’s Sports
    • Basketball
    • Beach Volleyball
    • Field Hockey
    • Golf
    • Gymnastics
    • Hockey
    • Lacrosse
    • Rowing
    • Soccer
    • Softball
    • Swimming
    • Tennis
    • Track & Field
    • Volleyball
    • Water Polo
    • Wrestling
    Men’s Sports
    • Baseball
    • Basketball
    • Football
    • Golf
    • Hockey
    • Lacrosse
    • Rowing
    • Soccer
    • Swimming
    • Tennis
    • Track & Field
    • Volleyball
    • Water Polo
    • Wrestling
    Coed Sports
    • Cheerleading
    Resources
    • By Sport
      • Women’s Sports
        • Basketball
        • Golf
        • Hockey
        • Rowing
        • Softball
        • Tennis
        • Volleyball
        • Wrestling
        • Beach Volleyball
        • Field Hockey
        • Gymnastics
        • Lacrosse
        • Soccer
        • Swimming
        • Track & Field
        • Water Polo
        Men’s Sports
        • Baseball
        • Golf
        • Lacrosse
        • Soccer
        • Tennis
        • Volleyball
        • Wrestling
        • Basketball
        • Football
        • Hockey
        • Rowing
        • Swimming
        • Track & Field
        • Water Polo
        Coed Sports
        • Cheerleading
      General Resources
      • College Recruiting Guides
        • How to Get Recruited
        • The Recruiting Process
        • Contacting Coaches
        • Recruiting Guide for Parents
      • Scholarships
        • Scholarship Facts
        • Find Scholarships
      • NCAA Eligibility
        • NCAA Eligibility Center
        • NCAA Eligibility Requirements
        • NCAA Recruiting Rules
        • NCAA Recruiting Calendars
      • More Resources
        • NAIA Eligibility
        • Workshops
        • Blog
    Connect
    Schedule Assessment Schedule Assessment phone icon Call Us chat icon Start a Chat
  • Colleges
    COLLEGES

    Search every school in our database to find the one that fits for you.

    By Division
    • NCAA Division 1
    • California
    • Florida
    • New York
    • Texas
    • NCAA Division 2
    • NCAA Division 3
    • NAIA
    • Rankings
    By Sport
    Women’s Sports
    • Basketball
    • Beach Volleyball
    • Field Hockey
    • Golf
    • Gymnastics
    • Hockey
    • Lacrosse
    • Rowing
    • Soccer
    • Softball
    • Swimming
    • Tennis
    • Track & Field
    • Volleyball
    • Water Polo
    • Wrestling
    Men’s Sports
    • Baseball
    • Basketball
    • Football
    • Golf
    • Hockey
    • Lacrosse
    • Rowing
    • Soccer
    • Swimming
    • Tennis
    • Track & Field
    • Volleyball
    • Water Polo
    • Wrestling
    Coed Sports
    • Cheerleading
    Colleges
    • By Division
        • NCAA Division 1
        • California
        • Florida
        • New York
        • Texas
        • NCAA Division 2
        • NCAA Division 3
        • NAIA
      By Sport
      • Women’s Sports
        • Basketball
        • Golf
        • Hockey
        • Rowing
        • Softball
        • Tennis
        • Volleyball
        • Wrestling
        • Beach Volleyball
        • Field Hockey
        • Gymnastics
        • Lacrosse
        • Soccer
        • Swimming
        • Track & Field
        • Water Polo
        Men’s Sports
        • Baseball
        • Golf
        • Lacrosse
        • Soccer
        • Tennis
        • Volleyball
        • Wrestling
        • Basketball
        • Football
        • Hockey
        • Rowing
        • Swimming
        • Track & Field
        • Water Polo
        Coed Sports
        • Cheerleading
    • Rankings
    Connect
    Schedule Assessment Schedule Assessment phone icon Call Us chat icon Start a Chat
  • Camps
  • Contact Us
  • Join Today
  • Popular Links
    • Name Image Likeness (NIL)
    • NCAA Transfer Rules
    • NCAA Scholarship Limits by Sport
    • College Recruiting Guides
    • Everything You Need to Know About JUCO
    • Athlete Success Stories
  • Shop at IMGAcademy
  • Create My Profile
    • Stand out to college coaches
    • Attend free workshops
    • Access our college coach directory
    • Track college coach activity
    • Find more schools that match your needs
    • Get expert guidance
    Join Free Today
Parents Start Here Athletes Start Here
Home > Blog > Should Parents Talk to College Coaches?

Get Recruited To Play Sports in College

Join the Largest Recruiting Network

Parents Start Here
Athletes Start Here

I wouldn’t be going to the school I’m going to without NCSA.” – Student Athlete

Categories
Categories
  • About NCSA
  • Athlete Success Stories
  • Athletic Recruiting
  • Coach Communication
  • College Search
  • FAQs
  • Mental Health & Nutrition
  • NCAA News
  • Scholarships
  • Training

Should Parents Talk to College Coaches?

By

NCSA College Recruiting

Should Parents Talk to Coaches Blog

College coaches across all sports agree that parents play a significant role in the athletic recruiting process. NCSA’s 2019 State of Recruiting report found that on a scale from 1 to 10, coaches ranked the impact of parents on an athlete’s recruiting process as 8.

While it’s true that a strong support system–including parents–can help athletes navigate the ups and downs of their recruiting journeys, it’s important not to get too involved because “negative sideline behavior and helicopter parenting can scare away coaches.” The best things a parent can do are to provide support and encouragement, avoid taking the lead in interactions with coaches and allow their student-athlete to be the one to shine.


💡 Featured All-Access Workshop

Not sure what to ask a college coach as a junior or senior hoping to play your sport at the next level? In this all-access NCSA Recruiting Workshop, recruiting coach Ben Wright, former college basketball player and coach, breaks down the top five questions every athlete should ask. Get expert tips on how to lead confident, meaningful conversations that leave a lasting impression on college programs.

Watch Now

Does this mean parents shouldn’t talk to college coaches?

Not so fast! Parents can talk to coaches throughout the recruiting process–but they should also know when to speak up, and when to let their child lead the way. We’ve broken down when parents should and shouldn’t talk to a coach, what topics to stick to and how to encourage a student-athlete to speak up.

When should parents avoid talking to college coaches?

Introducing yourself to a coach, whether in person or via phone, email or DM is a great way for the student-athlete to make a great first impression. However, parents should not be doing the legwork for their athletes, especially at the beginning of the recruiting process. So, is it bad for a parent to call a college coach? During a Positive Coaching Alliance panel, Stanford’s head men’s golf coach Conrad Ray said that “the worst thing for [coaches] in our world is if we get a phone call and it’s the mom or dad of a high school freshman or sophomore telling me how good their kid is.”Some other situations parents should avoid include:

  • Calling coaches to ask questions about the team
  • Calling coaches about campus life or campus culture
  • Calling coaches early in the recruiting process to ask about scholarships
  • Answering the phone for your athlete when a coach calls

Parents should avoid calling college coaches and speaking on behalf of their athlete. There are other opportunities for parents to communicate with coaches. At the end of the day, college coaches aren’t recruiting parents–they’re recruiting student-athletes. They want to get to know their potential recruits and build a relationship with them first. The more involved parents are, the more it detracts from the athlete connecting with a coach, and ultimately, hinders their chances of getting recruited. A surefire way to get noticed, and remain on a coach’s radar? Allow the athlete to take the lead, from sending that first email, picking up the phone or approaching a coach at a recruiting event.

Insider tip: If parents have legitimate questions for a college coach, or their athlete is unsure of how to start or respond to a conversation, it’s okay to help them out behind the scenes! Parents can brainstorm questions to ask, proofread messages and jot down some talking points for a phone call or visit, but emails, phone calls and most of the talking should be done by the potential recruit.

Parents should also be mindful of the NCAA recruiting rules and familiarize themselves with the NCAA recruiting calendars–they apply to parents, too. If the student-athlete is interested in a Division 1 or Division 2 program, many coaches can’t even reach out to them–or vice versa–until June 15 after their sophomore year. Similarly, if anyone in the athlete’s family approaches a coach at a recruiting event–even to say hello–they may cut the conversation short. They’re not being rude–they’re just trying to follow the rules!

When should parents talk to college coaches, and what should they talk about?

Thankfully, college coaches don’t expect parents to stay silent throughout the entire recruiting process. They understand that committing to a college or program is typically a family decision and that parents play an integral role in the process. So, when should parents approach a college coach, and what should they say?

If the athlete already has a relationship with a college coach, it’s completely fine to approach the coach when you see them at a camp or recruiting event. Wait until after the game, and keep it simple–a straightforward, “Hi Coach, I’m so-and-so’s mom/dad” will do. If a coach is interested, they’ll keep the conversation going. And remember, when the athlete joins the conversation, make sure they’re the ones asking and answering questions.

Unofficial and official visits are another great opportunity for parents to get to know a college coach. Coaches invite potential recruits and their parents to take a campus tour, learn more about the school and program, and answer any questions they have. It’s a great chance for coaches to get to know the family on a personal level. For instance, is their school the best academic, athletic, social and financial fit? It’s also a great time for parents to take on a bigger role during admissions and financial aid meetings, and ask any logistical questions they have, from student housing to campus safety. After all, it’s usually the parents that will cover at least a portion of the college costs.

How can parents encourage their athlete to communicate with coaches?

What happens if a student-athlete is too nervous to talk to coaches, too shy to speak up, or prefers that their parents speak on their behalf? It’s a parent’s job to support their athlete, but it’s also a parent’s responsibility to get their athlete to take the lead, even if they’re anxious at first. Contacting coaches is essential to the recruiting process and being proactive and reaching out first could help set a potential recruit apart from their competition. To help athletes in this regard, parents can work on understanding regulations, including the NCAA recruiting rules and calendar.

It’s completely understandable for student-athletes to be nervous when reaching out to a coach. They may not know how to strike up a conversation, what questions to ask or how to keep the conversation going. That’s why it’s crucial to prepare in advance, whether it’s drafting an initial message, writing down talking points for a phone call, or even practicing what they’ll say on a visit. It doesn’t have to be perfect – just like with athletics, coaches want to see that the athlete is putting in effort and getting more comfortable as they progress in the recruiting process.

The bottom line? College coaches want to get to know recruits and their parents, too. While parents shouldn’t ignore a coach altogether, make sure the athlete is handling most of the communication. Knowing when to speak up and when to let the athlete do the talking can be a surefire way to positively impact their recruiting and increase their chances of landing a coveted roster spot or scholarship offer.

Read more: College Recruiting Tips for Parents

NCSA Logo
  • Connect with us on Facebook
  • Connect with us on Instagram
  • Connect with us on TikTok
  • Connect with us on YouTube
  • Connect with us on Twitter
About
  • About Us
  • Reviews
  • Our Experts
  • Our Partners
  • Careers
  • All in Award
  • Shop at IMGAcademy
Mobile Apps
IMG Academy+

IMG Academy+

Mental Performance & Nutrition

Download IMG Academy+ on the App Store
NCSA

NCSA

Athletic Recruiting

Download NCSA on the App Store Download NCSA on the Google Play Store
  • BBB Accredited Business
  • Nortan Secured
  • Certified Compliant
© 2002-2025 NCSA College Recruiting All Rights Reserved Terms of Use Privacy Policy Notice at Collection Your Privacy Choices California Consumer Privacy Act (CCPA) Opt-Out Icon